Hope

This evening the doctor came to Dad's room and asked if everything was okay. I looked at him and said, "aren't you supposed to tell me if everything is okay?"
He smiled.
He did say that Dad has released a lot of fluid today, which is good. Otherwise they'll tell us more in the morning.
I also asked if he thought visitors helped--Dad had many today--and he said definitely.

THANK YOU to all who came.

There isn't news, but tonight gave me hope, so I wanted to share what happened in attempt to pass on the hope. It's my therapy/journal.

Dad had so many family members come today: Tim 'n Gail, Laura 'n Gary, Kristiana, (Mili watched my kids, so she was there in spirit--and all the aforementioned people watched my kids, and I can't tell you how thankful I am...tearful too), Palmer, Newman, Lynette 'n Dan, Greg and Laurel Simonsen (long-time friends), besides all us kids and Mom.

At the end of the day he was very alert and knew all who were there. I asked if he knew that Tim and Palmer had been there, and he answered in his own little voice, "You bet." I told him Ted and Naida might come, and I think his eyes probably said something like, "Oh, they don't need to do that."

Each time someone came he perked up a little more. I like to think he's been carried on love today, and so much of it.

The Simonsens came in and each expressed love for Dad. He had thoughtful tears rolls down his cheeks and we could tell he wanted very much to tell them many things too. He did finally say, and I'm sure EVERYONE has heard him say it, "Bless your heart."

I know he had tears for so many who came today, if not everyone. And because we all know Dad, we know they are heartfelt tears of love--and really, he probably feels bad he's worrying everyone so much; poor dang Dad can't worry about himself for even a minute!!

Greg is a U of U fan, so when he started a little friendly banter Dad perked up even more and tried with all his might to reply. Throughout the conversation he said more of his own little sayings that come so naturally to him.

Greg promised to go with him to a BYU game next year, and take him to a U game, and I think that's enough to keep Dad alive. Thanks Greg--we'll all hold you to it, with or without Dad.

He also downed a diet/caffeine-free coke tonight.

I'm still holding on to hope, not for dear life, but because there IS some to hold on to. I understand the reality of it, but I know there are two roads to go on...now is when I hope Dad chooses the one less traveled--life.

I also hope some of us realize there are many things that should be said before it's too late. I'm definitely going to tell Dad how much it means to me when he holds his newborn grand babies and sniffs their little heads and smiles--and sniffs and smiles again, and listens and enjoys their little newborn noises. And I'm going to tell him he'd better be there to do it again with this next one--one way or the other.

He was exhausted by tonight and that was the last thing he said, "I'm just tired." Thanks everyone, for wearing him out and keeping him alive with love.

P.S.
We'll be making a poster for him with any expressions of love people send him, so please add comments on these blog postings, call me, or come by (just remember to sanitize your hands and wear a mask if you MIGHT have an illness). We'll include everyone who has already come by or left messages, etc.